You can have all the plans in the world but there is no guarantee that any of it, or even a part of it, will work out as you planned, unless, of course, you're dealing with the hard facts of supply and demand. People will buy Christmas Trees at Christmas, restaurants will prepare turkey and dressing at Thanksgiving, and champagne will be toasted on New Years. But life? Fasten your seatbelts.

Eric and I weren't thinking about getting married until Spring '98, but when Father Richardson at St. Anthony's phoned, asking for a meeting-- we realized our expected timeline could indeed change. Here was a Catholic priest, wanting to talk to two gay men about a commitment ceremony in an institution that forbade such behavior.

As all three of us sat in Richardson's chamber, nervously anticipating his response to our request. After a couple of minutes of small talk, he pulled from his desk several files.

"I decided to do some more research and have discovered that for me to commit a commitment ceremony under the guises of the church--- in a place of worship--- is against Papal law and more than likely will result in certain actions from Rome. Myself, I am straight. Though I know plenty of priests that aren't."I have my own reasons for calling you in here today and if anyone were to ask me if I said what I am about to say, I would deny it. I cannot stress it enough that what we're about to discuss stays between us. Agreed?"

We all mumbled audibly in agreement, nodding our heads--- eager with anticipation.

"I am a servant of God, as we all are, and have to report to only one person--- God. But I also believe that God is within us, and that our ultimate Creator resides within our souls--- which is why he's talking to me, I believe."

Great, I thought. A priest who's losing his mind.

"St. Joan rallied against the church because of the voices inside her head. And while I'm not completely in favor of your proposition, I understand what and why you are seeking it."

"Good, that's good,"ballyhooed Mrs. Espinosa, "But give us the bottom line, Father. Are you going to marry my son in your church?"

"No, I am not going to marry your son--- in my church."

"Then I don't understand why you asked us here."

"I won't marry your son and Andrew HERE. Understand?"

The lull in the room was obvious. So what he was saying was that he wouldn't marry us here, but somewhere else...?

"Okay,"Said Mrs. Espinosa. "What about Dodger Stadium?"

He simply nodded no. "A private ceremony is all that I would consider."

"But..."I chimed in. "In the eyes of God, you're simply removing it from a building--- but the bottom line is you're still condoning a homosexual relationship--- which would go against God."

"I believe it would go against the Church--- but not against God."

Another spell of silence as everyone tried to figure out exactly what this guy was up to and why.

"You're questioning your faith."Said Eric.

"Not my faith,"said the father, "But the institution."

"Then what good would your word be to us in a commitment ceremony?"

"It would be just that, my word--- and not the agenda of the church." He turned to Eric's mom. "I'm sure this isn't what you had mind when you came to me, and certainly I never believed I'd be saying this, but I am willing to marry your son and his partner in the eyes of God. It will be a Catholic ceremony, but it will not be in a church."

"Does that make it legal?" she asked.

"Mom," blurted Eric. "No matter where we do it, it's not legal."

"But legal in the eyes of the church?"

The Father simply shook his head no, responding, "It will be legal in the eyes of God."

In that instant, I saw Mrs. Espinosa's eyes begin to water--- suddenly overcome with emotion--- and I realized she had gotten what she wanted. While it may not be in a church, it would be a secret Catholic ceremony celebrating the marriage of two men.

The Lord moves in mysterious ways.