Fran and I were the last to arrive. Not that we weren't eager to see everyone together again, it was just that we kept re-dressing each other before we left. I was having a blast staying with her talking, drinking, and just feeling free. Okay, it sounds hokey I know, but what can I say, maybe deep inside I'm really a geek.

We ended up both in black, but I wore a floral scarf. She said it was too femme for her. The nerve!

Mocha Daze looked great. Steve had a long table all dressed with linens, candles, goblets, silver, and china. As we walked in Steve handed us each a glass of champagne and said, "Things change."

"They sure the hell do, don't they Steve?" I didn't know what came over me, but I felt like I had the power of the Gods behind me. I didn't care what anyone thought of me anymore, let alone Steve, the lunatic. But it's funny, as much pain as he caused me-- it was good to see him, and it was then that I realized maybe that's what closure is all about.

Eric stood next to Hillary, the woman I met at the sex recovery group. She wore purple, an excellent choice I thought for her coloring, but maybe a bit too loud for her size. Eric raised his glass announcing, "I'd like everyone to meet my good friend Hillary. Hillary, that's everybody."

Everyone laughed, hugged, and told each other how great they looked. Mike had his new girlfriend there, Prudence, and while she pretended with a smile, I could tell it was a strain for her to say hello. But the bottom lineŅit didn't matter, we were all together.

The gang settled down and I asked for another glass of champagne which Steve anxiously accommodated. Had he changed or was this some kind of game? I raised my glass. "Girls," then looking towards Mike and Steve I said, "And gentleman," rolling my eyes (I heard a few chuckles), "I'd like to testify."

Now their eyes rolled, moaning and growning about the church's evil ways. "No, no, no, I'm not here to promote or debase the church. I'm hear to officially announce that I left Donna and to tell you allthat I'm a fucking queer."

Now this garnered applause and whistles. "Let me add by saying that I will always be a gay man." I had a rhythm going now. "And not my father, not Donna, not God is going to be able to change that. And as a matter of fact-- if they could change me, I'd say no. I'm staying who I am because I like it that way."

I got a hug from everyone except Prudence who nodded with half-acceptance.

Steve suddenly announced, "This declaration deserves one more glass of champagne and then we begin with appetizers." He filled everyone's glass and then we toasted to a very special group, one that we had lost track ofŅus.

As I glanced around the room, I thought about how good things can be and suddenly I became inspired. I remembered who I was, a painter, and now, more than ever, I wanted to paint my friends. But why did Steve look so angry?