It was an enlightening moment at the grocery store on the corner of La Cienega and Beverly. It started with meeting Rebecca Granville.

I was picking up some staples for home and had managed to bring the list of things I'd been meaning to get and always forgot: tooth whitening paste, floor cleaners, clothes soap. I was engrossed in the new fat free chips when I ran right into Rebecca -- we took a beat and then recognized each other.

"Rebecca, right?" I asked.

"Yeah... and you're his... roommate?"

"You could call me that," I said. "You could also call me his lover," I continued. I was going to go further but her expression stopped me cold. Obviously, Eric hadn't told her much.

"Are you sure?" she asked, which made me laugh out loud. I showed her my gold band, the one Eric and I had exchanged with each other a few months after we met. She blanched again...

"I know Eric's not 'out' at work, Rebecca. But obviously, you two are so close that I assumed he told you about he and I."

"Well, actually, Andrew-- Eric said you were gay and interested in him but that he had no intention of doing anything sexual with you. You see, Andrew... Eric has been -- well, we've been sort of.... seeing each other."

It was my turn to turn white as a sheet. I suddenly felt sick and looked to see if I was very far from the front doors of the market. I wasn't. Rebecca took my arm as we left our carts and moved quickly for the doors.

We found a patio table just outside the flower section and I sat down... I was utterly confused...

But not for long. After over an hour of discussion, both Rebecca and I had a good idea of what had been going on. We realized Eric was in way over his head. I was so glad he hadn't gone all the way and had sex with Rebecca... but I had my doubts as to how far he did go.

"And San Francisco?" I asked.

"Well, the trip was my idea, Andrew," she said. "But God, you have to believe, I had absolutely no idea you and Eric were together. Eric came onto me pretty strong for a while before I suggested we go away for a weekend. And nothing happened up there."

"I know," I said. "I was there, too." Rebecca was confused.

I let her know I had suspected Eric was up to something when he said he was going to Las Vegas but his flight itinerary said San Francisco. I followed him to San Francisco to see what was up. I felt so stupid now, especially since I came back from the weekend feeling confident nothing was going on.

I never thought Eric had designs on a woman.

I never suspected.

Rebecca could see how humiliated I felt. She reached across the table and held my hand, "I'm so sorry, Andrew. I've never done this before-- I would never involve myself with a man who was committed to someone else."

I nodded, unable to speak.

"Especially when the person he's involved with is the same sex," she smiled. I looked at her and couldn't help smiling, too. We laughed.

Jeez, here we were -- a man and a woman, one gay, one straight -- both feeling so bizarre because of a man who apparently was both... or neither. We both started laughing... we just couldn't help it. This was all too much.