Claudia had short curly hair, mid-40's, and sat behind a metal desk with a Powerbook opened to a call sheet. Her tired brown eyes incessantly glanced around the commercial production office, responding to the flurry of activity.
I spoke louder to get her attention. "I was responsible for Helen's wardrobe in every aspect-- what it was, how it looked, and that it was ready and easy. Helen liked it comfortable." I worried about sounding too personal with Helen because Claudia could likely call Helen-- and God only knows what Helen would say about me.
"Is she as funny in real life as she is on her show?" asked the curious Claudia.
"So funny, she is so funny."
Claudia laughed as if I had just told a joke. I continued, determined. "I really know how a set works and I get along well with people." Suddenly, I wondered if that was a lie.
"Hey, don't sweat it. Hillary said you were great, that's why I called you."
I felt the chill rise from my spine. "Hillary?"
"How do you think you got this interview?"
Suddenly I looked at Claudia and wondered if she was a man, if they're all connected in some kind of transvestite network.
"She's a friend of my brother's. He met her in New York." She leaned in to me and whispered, "A drag club, they met at a drag club. My brother, in a word, is gorgeous."
She sat back in her chair and I smiled politely. Hillary was helping me and I should be grateful but I couldn't help wonder if there was an ulterior motive. After all, with all that had been going onÑI took nothing for granted anymore.
She continued, "Anyway, I do have to check a reference but only one. Who should I call: Tigre Designs, the Studio, or Helen herself?"
What a predicament? I had to choose one, I smiled again, and said, "Helen, I guess you should call Helen."
She perked up, "Great. So listen, I DO have a job tomorrow. If I get a hold of Helen todayand everything checks out, can you work/"
I chewed my thumbnail and nodded yes, wondering if I'd ever really work again.
I made Greg stay with me in my apartment as I waited for the phone to ring. If Helen gave me a bad reference, I was screwed. Not only would it ruin my chances with this agency, but also word would quickly spread and I'd be unemployable. I'd have to change my career.
Greg sucked on a Toostie Pop, glancing up from his ARTNEWS magazine. "You think Hillary would let me paint her?"
Another conversation about Hillary. This woman had truly infiltrated our lives. "Before or after her upcoming operation?" I asked.
"Now. I want to paint her now. Let me ask you a question, Fran, how can you refer to her as Hillary so easily?"
"Because she's stated who she is and she's coming to my side. Women are protective. Besides, which would you rather be called, Hugo or Hillary?"
"Just Greg, but I see your point. However, I do really want to paint her."
THE PHONE RANG.
Greg looked at me, crossing his fingers. With a nervous sigh, I picked up the receiver. "Hello."
"Fran?"
"Yes, Claudia, this is Fran." I was way too anxious and I realized not only did I care about getting the job, but I cared about what Helen thought of me. I missed her all of a sudden and my heart was heavy. It seemed like a universe was created in the time it took for Claudia to say anything.
"Well, you sure do have a fan."
"I do?"
"Helen really raved about you." It's amazing how just a few small words can alter your whole perception of someone. "I couldn't get her off the phone."
"Really?"
"You're surprised?"
"Well, I was... you know. Compliments for me aren't always easy."
"Modest, too. Yeah, well she said she missed having you around. Why'd you leave anyway?"
"Well, I wanted...I wanted to go freelance."
I hated lying but I couldn't tell her the truth-- not only for me, but to protect Helen, especially now that I knew she missed me.
Claudia and I continued to make small talk until she gave me the address of my job the next day. "It's for Bic."
"For what? What's that?"
"You know, Bic pens. Just make sure you bring your own iron and lint remover. You'll probably need something to remove ink stains. Get it?" She laughed.
She was no Helen. "Yeah, okay, listen thanks Claudia. I really appreciate it."
