I tried my mother's number through out the day, but no one answered. Not even the machine picked up. I contemplated calling my sister, Ruth, but decided against it. I didn't need to hear her whine today.

"How are you, Daddy?" I asked the photo near my bed. "I'm thinking about you. I miss you..."

I shopped that day in his honor. Dad's check was well spent. Got myself some new jeans, new boots, tempted myself with another leather jacket, but got a new silk suit instead.

*****

When I got home, Lanie called. "Yo, Fran. I was wondering if you were going to go to Lori's tonight."

I hedged.

"Come on," she said. "You need to get back in the girl set. You've been hanging around too many boys."

Well, she had a point there.

"Fine, I'll see you there," I said, and hung up. There comes a time in your life when you have to make a decision: shit or get off the pot. Christine was now the past. Ms. Green Eyes from New Year's Eve? I was convinced was a figment of my imagination. And Jane, well -- okay. I just had to put it/her out of my mind.

I wore the new suit to Lori's.

Lanie met me at the door and exclaimed,"You're stylin', Fran! You look great!"

"Thanks," I muttered. I was feeling a little overdressed.

"No way," said Lanie. "It's a good thing." She looked at me closely, searched my eyes. She said her grandmother would do this when she was searching for a person's true-ness. She seemed satisfied with what she found. "It's a good thing."

"What?! What is?"

"You've decided to live. Your eyes have light in them. Let's party."

I shook my head, amused and bemused; but with a sense of comfort. The shit was finished. Time to get off the pot.