Kurt had stopped by Mocha Daze. Again. Going on and on about how bad he felt about not knowing where Hugo was or why he had disappeared.

"You've got to be kidding," I said. "What could you have done to stop it?"

"I'm a cop, damnit. I'm supposed to notice what's going on around me. I just wish I knew where he was."

"He broke the law, Kurt! Insurance fraud, arson. Do you honestly think he's going to leave a forwarding address?"

"I know, I know."

He really missed my Dad. And in a strange way, so did I. Barbra was getting on my nerves lately and if there was one thing that Hugo and I could connect on, was bitching about Barbra. At least until the silence born between us would turn awkward and then Hugo would say, "But you're marrying her."

Exactly, marrying her for the simple reason of money. To get my fair share in life, to get more than I've ever had, to get what I deserve. People wait their entire lives for the lottery-- well, this time, for the first time in my life, my numbers are up.

No more regret. No more guilt. Take the lead and don't look back.

Kurt and I parted with a few dull philosophies about how you can't really know another person, even somebody you're involved with over a period of time.

I gave him my telephone number and told him to call me if he needed to talk.

Support your local police department, that's my motto.

*****

I phoned the good doctor at his office.

"Calling to see how you're doing, Eric. Screw anybody over, lately?"

"How did you get my office number?"

"You're listed in the Yellow Pages, Doctor Lewis." I knew the cloth over the receiver muffled my voice, and I spoke deep-- non-emotional and cold.

"Oh."

Silence.

"Have you come up with a price for the videotape?"

"How do I know this whole thing isn't some kind of set-up? That you aren't one of Drew's friends dicking me around? Show him the tape. I've got nothing to hide."

Silence.

I hung up the phone and realized he was serious.

If he wanted to play, I was going to have to play. Tease him a little bit more to get him to jump a little higher.

*****

Barbra leaned over and gave me kiss. "If you're a good boy, I'm going to sign over the papers to Mocha Daze on our wedding day, baby."

"You're not telling me anything I don't already know, Barbra, " I said. "Make my day. Tell me something new."

"How about 'I love you' ?"

I smiled and calmly said, "I love you", feeling absolutely nothing.

.

She laid her head down on my chest and played with my nipple. "Stay on the straight and narrow, honey, and God will reward you."

Yes, He will. He better.