I hadn't been to Mocha Daze since the fire. I think I had a block. I was too afraid of not seeing Hugo there. But Hugo had been on my mind for three days, and I had no choice but to go and see Steve.

On my way in I passed Barbra. She said, "hello" and tried to cover her eyes with the palm of her hand, and veering away from me.

I called her name twice, unsuccessfully. As I watched her skirt away, I thought of a Geisha girl doing a ceremonial dance and I quivered inside. I don't go to Japanese gardens because I can't get this picture out of my mind of women in flowing white sheers, bowing backwards away from men, and the men laughing deep inside. It makes me ill.

Steve stood behind the cash register with his dick almost in the drawer. He had no other customers. I walked up to him. "Double capp."

He placed his foot on the shelf below, leaned on his knee, and chugged a swallow of coffee.

Nonchalantly, I looked around waiting for him to make my coffee. Glancing at him I said, "Barbra seemed in a hurry. She okay?"

That did it. He turned away without a word and started to froth the milk.

"Seen anybody around?" I said, but my words were drowned by bubbling milk and his desire not to hear me.

He pulled the metal container away and spooned the milk into the oversized cup. I was ready with two open bags of raw sugar, when he placed the coffee in front of me. I poured and stirred while he waited for money. I decided that if he didn't piss me off, I would pay for it. In a former life, Steve and I would have made a classic brother and sister.

"So Steve, the police think Hugo just set the fire and took off?"

"Yeah, well what else would they believe? "

"I don't know, it just doesn't make any sense, especially if you know Hugo. And you know I do, and I know you do, of course you do. I mean you're his son." I could tell Steve didn't even like the thought of that. "Hey, I wonder if the police know that. I mean, if they figured that out."

"They don't give a shit. And I don't give a shit what they know. Now you owe me two-fifty."

I made no attempt at getting any money and sipped my capp. I could feel the rim of foamy milk on my upper lip and I licked it off.

He smirked and said, "I bet you're good at licking."

I laughed because I thought it was funny. "I am as a matter of fact. But you know what I can't figure out?

"What's that sugar?"

"Why do you hate me?"

"I don't hate you." His face squished.

"Then tell me if you know anything about Hugo. Please just tell me, I am only concerned for him."

"Oh, isn't he lucky. Look, I don't know shit about Hugo. As far I am concerned, he's gone and that's that."

"He's your dad."

"Hey you know what? No charge for the coffee. It's on the house, but the house requests this is your last visit to Mocha Daze."

He walked off to the manager's office and I mumbled, "Well, that doesn't mean that I won't come back."