I was on the phone with Rebecca...

"Oh come on. It's just lunch. Look Rebecca there's a lot I need to say. I need to clear the air with you I know I've lied and I know I let you on but you owe me lunch at least to make things right between us...No just you and me Rebecca. The things I need to tell you to confess to you...they're just for you. Come on what do you say? One o'clock?"

*****

"What can I say? Being gay doesn't come easy for me. Being a gay man in the nineties is a pain in the butt-- I saw you, I met you and I thought...maybe, maybe I could make it work. My God Rebecca-- you should be flattered. I mean you're amazing enough to turn gay men straight-- doesn't that make you feel powerful?"

"No Eric. It doesn't make me feel anything but duped. God Eric. Do people really think like that? Do you honestly believe that I'd be honored to be pursued by a gay man? Give me a little credit. And what's so wrong with being gay? Look at Andrew. He's one of the most terrific men I've ever met and seems to be able to deal with it. Eric you need to look at what you have not what you don't have. You're a gay man Eric. Like it or not you are...and until you accept that you'll never be happy. Never."

Who did this bitch think she was some kind of psychotherapist? Some expert on what makes men gay or straight? I'd had just about enough of her condescension and "Dear Abby" advice. I had the urge to toss my glass of wine in her face and walk out leaving her with the check.

"You're so right Rebecca. I'm sorry...clearly I had no idea what kind of woman you are when we met. I thought things could be different and I was totally mistaken. I'm-- I'm really really glad you and Andrew are friends though. And maybe that's the reason for this whole thing. I mean you two seem like soul-mates or something. Maybe that's the best thing that could come out of this."

"Yeah...maybe," she said. "And maybe you're pulling a big line of crap with me just like all the other lines you've pulled. Jesus Eric. Get it together. Why did you demand we have lunch? To feed me this line of bull? You're jealous as hell that Andrew and I are friends. Admit it."

I had to give this lousy witch credit. She was smart. She nailed me.

"I'm sorry you feel that way Rebecca. I was hoping we could be friends too."

She got up finished her wine and put her napkin on the table.

"Eric we can be friends when you start facing who you are and what you are. When that happens give me a call."