Drew was crying, sitting in the living room, and I didn't know what to do. Our argument had reached its peak. As we were trying to finish filling out the domestic partnership registration form, I thought it would be funny if after our names, I put in parenthesis "HUSBAND" after my name and "WIFE" after Drew's. We had been arguing who fit those roles the best, and I had taken control and branded ourselves accordingly.

The bottom line, I couldn't let myself be anything less than a man. But if that was true, why did I suddenly feel like such an asshole? Typically male.

I joined Drew on the couch, handing him the domestic partnership form. He looked, seeing that I had crossed out the HUSBAND and WIFE and put BEST FRIEND after each of our names.

"Nice try," mumbled Drew.

"You want me to be the wife?" I asked him.

"Sometimes you are. And sometimes I am."

"Like you are right now?" I couldn't believe I said it. His head spun around at me like a snake about to devour a rodent. "Drew, this is ridiculous. We're acting like children."

"You started it."

Maybe we should do this another night or something."

In that moment, Andrew took the piece of paper and signed it, handing it back to me.

"Gee," I said. "I thought this was about love."

"So did I. But I wasn't the one with a pre-nuptial; I wasn't the one with the 'wife' issue."

"What is it that I can do that will help you understand I don't have a problem with it?"

"Admit that you do have a problem with it."

I was silent. Jesus, relationships are such work. "All right, Andrew, I admit I have problem with being...the wife, but in any relationship, one is going to be more dominant than the other. It's just...we haven't ever talked about it because before we weren't getting married. And now, we are." I paused, a sudden wave of emotion rising across me. "I proposed to YOU, Andrew."

"That doesn't make you better."

"I know, I know. We're doing this because we love each other. And I admit this has brought up labels for me- macho bullshit labels. We are men. We are husbands, we are wives, we are whatever we want to be. And...I'm sorry if I hurt you."

Drew was silent.

"I'm trying here."

He took my hand, still unable to look at me, so I continued. " Sometimes I feel like I have to always be in control. But I'm learning. I hope you understand that."

Drew didn't move.

"You keep hearing that, I know. 'I'm learning.' But I am. I love you so much, Drew."

I reached forward and kissed him. Labels, names, egos, power, control- all of it vanished away in that single moment and I realized that neither one of us were the husband or the wife. We were Eric and Drew.

And fortunately, that was enough.