"Not bad, Andrew, not bad at all," I thought. "You survived your naked butt (and more) being printed in a national skin magazine, you survived almost destroying your relationship by sleeping with your first true love, and you may actually have patched up a friendship with Greg that was headed for a brick wall. You're doing pretty damn well! And that doesn't even include your terrific new job."
Okay, Andrew -- HIGH FIVE!
Our housekeeper brought the mail in and set in on the desk in front of me as I finished leaving a message for my mother.
"It's your favorite kid here, stuck in sunny L.A. How's the gang? When are y'all comin' for a visit and did you get my letter from a month ago? I never heard from you. Anyway -- give me a call. I'm home in the mornings. I love you both! Bye."
I thumbed through the mail - bill - bill - bill - - - -- ------ - - - - - -- Jesus.
WHY YOU WOULDWASTE YOUR LIFE AWAY ON HIM ON ERIC LEWISWHEN YOU COULD HAVE MEI WOULDN'T CHEAT ON YOUI WOULD BE TRUETO YOUFOREVERI WILLFOREVER *****I hardly noticed the tears pouring down my face.I wasn't crying. It didn't feel like crying, it wasn't crying. It was something else.It was sadness, it was grief. He was back. He wanted to do more, to have more of me. To take it all away, everything I'd worked for -- he wanted. And in a way, he already had it. If I could go from feeling so great to this... who was really in charge of my life? Me?Or him?I didn't know anymore.
