I hadn't seen him like this in a long time-- and a part from the fact that our relationship had gone through some ups and downs lately in regards to the "blue photos" incident as we referred to it... he was still my friend and he was a mess.
He'd finally broken things off with Steve. Or Steve had broken them off with him, I couldn't quite tell but it was definitely over and Greg was doing the "I'm never gonna have a boyfriend" thing.
Poor guy.
I reminded him of the state I'd been just before I met Eric. Four years ago when I had been the one "left on the dance floor" -- or more appropriately, left in Acapulco, Mexico with the entire hotel bill. I told him, "this is what comes from dating guys that are only into abuse."
He nodded but I didn't make a dent. I grabbed a couple of Diet Cokes and we sat out on the patio to have a real good "pity party." Greg got the chance to really let out how lonely he was, how much he felt like he'd done all the right things, how he was goodlooking, how he had a bank account, how he was healthy... where was the guy, he wondered... where was the guy?
And then he looked at me, "I mean, look at you and me, Andrew. We had our opportunity-- was it me? Did I derail that chance, too?"
"Greg-- believe me, darlin'. We're better as friends and you know it. You know we are meant to be here to support each other. We tried it and it didn't work."
"Wasn't I... weren't you turned on by me?"
"Greg-- Greg, this is too weird to discuss. There ain't no point in..."
"That's it," he said and turned away. He was totally wrong, and yet at the time, I was immensely attracted to him. I still hold his butt in the top ten list of my fantasy life. To say nothin' of the rest of him. But I wasn't gonna get into all that-- it was just what he was looking for, someone else to quickly obsess about...and it wasn't gonna be me.
"That's not it, Greg. You're a stud. You're just not my stud. Hey, how 'bout I fix you up with a couple guys at Eclectic Food? This new place is crawling with gorgeous guys."
"I need a husband, not a gorgeous guy!"
"Uh, excuse me but it does happen where you can get both. Look at me. That's it, I'm gonna put the word out. Hey, maybe this guy, Neal. He's really nice and single."
"Then what's wrong with him?" Greg asked and sulked. I knew he was interested though because he immediately started lookin' at his biceps. Greg always looked at his biceps when he was thinkin' of meeting a new guy. Greg had great arms and knew it.
I think it was working-- my diversion.
I went to get a couple more sodas and Neal's phone number.
